The real fight

We all have lived times and moments in situations where life and people have fought against us without any moral or justice. Each and everyone of us have gone through a path where life has done all that it has in its resources in that moment to harden us. Until some point it is necessary. But there will be a moment when we realize that if we keep just hardening ourselves for the future outcomes, we will die. Emotionally, spiritually and physically. It takes a hell of a lot of courage and patience to find grace in situations where cruelty seems to be the one and only right answer. To be truly able to embrace grace is one of toughest battles we encounter in our lives. It goes beyond many since this set our standards for being what we are from the core of our soul.

This doesn’t mean we can’t or shouldn’t fight when cruelty knocks on our door. The real fight is inside. Hardening ourselves through self made justifications is easy. To soften our ways to meet grace is the real fight. This does not take away the harder side of us. It just makes it possible and gives us and the world a second opportunity in this dualistic world we live in. Forgiving and forgetting walk hand in hand. If you have forgiven have you forgotten? With grace this is possible. Too soft is too soft, and too hard is often the load we ultimately bury ourselves underneath it. Grace makes everything light, even if the distance to the enemy is only few meters. Evolving exiges conflict, and conflicts finally bring peace. Hardness is protective and it sets walls and closes doors. It tries to control what can hurt us. Grace does something much more riskier, it stays open. Hardness is fast and instinctive. Grace is slow and deliberate. It takes awareness, restraint and especially courage.

Grace isn’t weakness. It’s true strength with compassion. Finding grace is hard because two parts of us collide. Our ego and our deeper self. Grace towards others starts with grace towards ourselves. Grace doesn’t bypass pain, it moves through them.

There’s an old saying which goes like this:

To harden a person you just need to bring loads of pain, but to soften somebody can be only done by themselves.